Monday, November 3, 2008

Virgin vs. Whore

In Women's Center two weeks ago we talked about the whore/virgin dichotomy and there was some very interesting discussion that came out of it. This is what I've summarized.

In today's society, women are not supposed to be sexual or comfortable with sexuality in general. Society views a woman who is open about her sexuality as a whore and a woman that is not open about sexuality is labeled a virgin. And a virgin is a woman who has no or completely ignores any of her sexual urges. There seems to be no middle ground. Also, it seems like guys like to hook up with girls who they see as "whores" but when looking for a relationship, they tend to look for a "virgin." Why is the "whore," the girl who is open about sexuality, not seen to be fit as girlfriend material? And when push comes to shove in a screaming match with women, what are the first insults to be shouted? Slut or whore. It is easy to attack another woman's sexuality even though you may not know her because you know it's something that will deeply wound her.
There are TV shows that are trying to break the dichotomy's barriers and show that women can be sexual and still worthy of a committed relationship. Shows like Sex and the City show that women can be powerful, intelligent, and sexy, all at the same time. However, the dichotomy still exists and women today are still held to these standards of conduct and expression of sexuality as a part of their existence in society. Will there be a day in the future when the expression of sexuality of a woman no longer matters?

Brenda

3 comments:

Tia Brown said...

I understand the point that has been made about women who are confident about their sexuality are seen as a slut or a whore. But I find this quite unfortunate because men who are confident with their sexuality and has sex with many women are seen as popular, powerful, and someone to be looked up too. There are so many teen movies out today, such as American Pie and Sex Drive, that are about teen boys who want to lose their virginity before going off to college. It is also made fun of in media if men do not lose their virginity by a certain age, such as in the movie 40 Year-Old Virgin. But in the media if women are seen as openly sexually promiscuous, they are viewed in a negative light.

Justine said...

I agree completely. We had a discussion on this topic in a class I took last semester. It seems that both categories, the "slut" and the "virgin" are many times negative for women. It seems that society has set up standards where women viewed through any sexual lens will be criticized. Men on the other hand are applauded for being promiscuous. I agree that shows like "Sex and the City" have made great attempts at showing sexual women in a positive light.

Marcella Katsnelson said...

I agree with the fact that women that are comfortable with their sexuality are commonly called "whores" and are considered to be both unfaithful and bad at relationships. "Virgins" are rarely wanted by guys to hook up with, but are considered to be the best at relationships. I think it is important that shows like Sex and the City show women that are open with their sexuality and are intelligent. Women can be open but still be capable of being in monogamous relationships.